What’s in a friend?

Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies. – Aristotle

Lately, I have been thinking about friendship since my blog post about abusing one of the most important friendships in my life. I started to think about all of the friendships that I have with others. As I get older, I have started to think about the individuals in my life and whether they embody my definition of friendship. What does that mean for that link in my social network if they do not embody that definition? I personally love Aristotle’s definition of friendships. I believe that people can have a person who is their soul mate, and the relationship can be completely platonic. They share a soul. This is the type of relationship where you can go months without talking, and then when you reconnect, it seems like you never lost each other. A friendship is where you share a soul with a person.

I have never really been pressed for friends. I do not care about popularity or whether or not someone likes me. Neither do I consider everyone I come into contact with my friend. The latter statement may seem obscure. Many people reading this may be thinking, who would do that? You would be surprised by the people who have reached adulthood and considers everyone they encounter a friend. Children on the playground are not the only ones who do this. My mom always taught me that everyone that you encounter is not your friend. They may smile in your face and enjoy your company, but when you need them, they are nowhere to be found. Those individuals are not friends- they are associates. There is nothing wrong with associates; they help you navigate the social scene, you can call on them to entertain you when you are bored, and they are always pleasantly lovely. However, associates hold no actual value in your long-term plans. They are temporary, with you for a season, and then you meet new associates. They may lie, cheat, and steal in order to put themselves ahead at your expense. I say all this about associates so you don’t confuse them with true friends.

A true friend comes with negativity. I mean that when your life is negative, they will be there. They are there through the thick of things to comfort, advise, and protect you. They will never leave you when things are complex; it is the opposite; they are right there with you. They will never leave when the friendship is being tested. They are also there when you succeed, and life is going well, but they never try to outshine, mooch, or hinder your success. These individuals are few and far between. When you find them cherish them, hold on to them, trust them, love them, share with them, and learn from them. Make sure that you have found a friend and not an associate. Do not confuse the two!

Until next time:

Let God’s light shine within you and through you!