Your happiness is the most important! These words are so actual; however, getting to this place took me a long time. This place of being content with my happiness. Three months ago, these words pierced my heart and soul when I looked into the mirror and said them to myself.
Three months ago, I was going through a transitional period (we will call it this). I was in the process of putting the pieces of my five-year plan back together. I grew concerned because, for the first time, my plan did not involve someone else. I felt alone, and that feeling of loneliness sparked feelings of fear. In my previous planning, I always saw friends, family, and a significant other in the picture. I am not saying that I will not have people in my life. However, my life will not have people as a critical focus. This was not by choice. I grew tired of the uncertainty and reliability of those around me. I did not want my life’s goals dependent upon someone else’s decision to be in my life.
This realization stung like a bee in the summer heat. I realized that I might be alone. I cannot always depend on friends or family being around. These people have their own lives to live, and so do I. They cannot always make themselves accessible, and neither can I. I took a long hard look in the mirror while affirming and said, “Only you can make yourself happy.”
These words gave me liberation. I was no longer held to the self-expectation of searching for validation and acceptance. I do not have to wait for people to show up in my life for my life to continue to move forward. I started creating the seamless blueprint of my life with myself, myself, and I. Before, I decided to make myself happy, I simply existed in this world, hoping that those around me would bring a justification to my being.
I am not trying to be mean-spirited or cast aspersions because my spiritual maturity will not allow that. However, I will choose to be unapologetically selfish. We spend so much time trying to be there for everyone around us that we often neglect the most important person. When I created my five-year plans in the past. I created them based on what I thought others wanted from me. I created them with the expectation that someone would always be there to expect something from me. However, no longer do I plan life this way. Instead, I am planning to live life for myself. I will do everything in my power to ensure happiness every day. This revelation has made me re-evaluate life. I feel that I can do anything.
Happiness lives inside of us. To phrase Barack Obama, “We are the change that we seek; it is in each of us.” To alter this sentiment, we are the ‘happiness’ we seek, which lives in each of us. Often we seek people and things to make us happy. However, we never look at the person who can bring us the most happiness—ourselves. It is ok to be self-centered when it comes to your happiness. If you tap into all that life has to offer, why is your life worth living?
Three months ago, I promised myself a few things after my revelation.
- I will live life unapologetically, being my true and authentic self.
- I will accomplish all of my dreams ( alone if I have to)
- I will not allow fear of being alone to stop me from doing anything
- I will conquer my fear even if they kill me
- I will acknowledge the simple joys of everyday life as much as possible
- I will not apologize for being selfish
- I will always work to make sure that I am moving forward.
I will do these things because they will make me happy, and only I can bring me happiness!
Until next time:
Let God’s Light shine within and through you!
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